Characteristics of a good wolf:
He prioritizes and protects his own pack.
His stated values are in alignment with those in his pack.
He acts according to his values, with rare exception.
He takes immediate responsibility and makes amends for mistakes.
—Steven R. Hobbs
People who say, “I have no regrets,” are not telling the truth. They should truthfully say either, “I avoid thinking about my regrets,” or, “I am content with the regrets I have chosen.” Every choice made in life excludes the opportunity for another experience, given the limits of time and resources. If I choose to go to the mountains this weekend, I cannot at the same time go to the beach. While I may prefer the benefits of going to the mountains, I am still missing out on the benefits of going to the beach. I may choose benefits of self employment, but I miss out on the opportunity to have the relative stability of being an employee of someone else. I may choose the benefits of not marrying, but I miss out on the opportunity of experiencing the depth of committed relationships of a spouse and children in a cohesive family. There is a price to be paid for every choice, an opportunity missed for every opportunity taken, a regret to be had for every regret avoided. The best we can do is to choose our regrets wisely. --Steven R. Hobbs
Trauma, pain, fear, lies and isolation are the food that addiction devours to stay alive. --Steven R. Hobbs
Three essential components of psychological health are 1. the ability to openly and honestly communicate thoughts, feelings, and behaviors with another, 2. the ability to honor agreements and disagreements, commonalities and distinctions, and 3. the ability to use personal resources to accomplish values-directed goals. --Steven R. Hobbs
Regret is the experience of acknowledging an unrealized opportunity that could have led to avoiding an unfortunate reality. —Steven R. Hobbs
“Addicts are those who use compulsive, obsessive, and destructive behavior to escape pain. This expresses itself in two ways: those overwhelmed because they have been exposed to excessive pain and cannot cope healthfully, and those overwhelmed because they have been sheltered from sufficient pain and cannot cope healthfully.” —Steven R. Hobbs
“It is better to live like a poor man and worry like a rich man, than to live like a rich man and worry like a poor man.” —Steven R. Hobbs
“Difficult trials are merely challenges which most other people will be unwilling or unable to overcome, but which I, with tenacity, resilience, and discipline, will prevail over, thereby earning the rewards envied by many and attained by few. When I come up against a difficulty, I have learned to think, ‘Good. This is an opportunity to move ahead of those less capable and less motivated individuals who will give up, even though I will not.’” —Steven R. Hobbs
“Healthy distractions are like gourmet meals; they demand something of you in time, preparation, patience, and effort, and they contribute to your long-term growth and well-being. Unhealthy distractions are like junk food; they demand very little of you in time, preparation, patience, and effort, and leave you feeling unfulfilled and regretful in the long-term.” —Steven R. Hobbs
“No one can live life without regrets. Missed opportunities are inevitable. The happiest people have learned to distinguish between regrets they are willing to accept, and regrets they are willing to work to avoid.” —Steven R. Hobbs
“When obstacles present themselves, don’t wait until you trip on them to try to change something; look ahead so you can avoid tripping in the first place.” —Steven R. Hobbs
“A victim is not empowered by the actions of others. A victim is empowered by their own determination to not live as a victim.” —Steven R. Hobbs